Solving the real version of a real-life problem

When you struggle to solve a problem, make a decision or form an opinion the solution can often be found by looking on another level in our mental model.

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It can be very challenging to zoom out, find patterns, blind spots and perhaps even the inner conflicts in our structure of beliefs. It's even more challenging, when emotions are involved for we have the ability to block out aspects of reality we don't like to face.

Looking for solutions at the real level of the problem

Our perception of one event influences the lens through which we perceive the next event. When we don't zoom out, in and perform reality checks regularly, our ability to do so gets rusty and we easily create more complex structures of layer upon layer of altered perceptions of reality, which is essentially self-hypnosis.

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Once we find the undefined beliefs and/or aspects of reality that were not yet recognized in defining the problem, it is usually instantly resolved on all levels or we know what to do next. We wake up, mainly because we became more real.

After years of solving business problems as a management consultant, I gradually developed an interest for and expertise in working with people, which has been my main activity since 2017 by means of providing personal consults and retreats.

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I found myself to be extremely passionate in providing rigorous analytical assistance for indicating one's own beliefs and deriving logical implications for solutions as well as breaking down aspects of reality that are difficult to face into digestible pieces – to break the self-hypnosis.

Case examples

Case 1:

a dilemma from having a desire to minimize one's carbon footprint, but also feeling a strong need to fly to a sunny destination in between two extremely busy periods at work.

Outcome: by making the beliefs explicit from which the dilemma arose, we found that a principle was missing for weighing her personal needs against other values. We derived such a principle from deeper beliefs and several dilemmas resolved instantly.

Case 2:

an educated 38 year old man, father of two young children, with a healthy financial position and a prosperous career is unhappy. He feels he would rather quit his career, sell  the house and live off-grid as a small farmer, but feels obliged to provide his family with the comfort and security only his current job provides.

Outcome: by tracing which aspects of his current life caused the drive to change direction 180-degrees, it turned out that the recurring theme was an inability to be authentic, both at work and at home. And we also found out that, based on his beliefs, his family would be better off without income security then with a father not honoring a true desire (which he found out he did not have for an off-grid life). When he improved his skills to be honest and applied them, he became much happier.

Case 3:

a client struggles to find the right approach for being restless from endlessly thinking about even the smallest decisions, both before and after making them, despite his strong analytical capabilities.

Outcome: by looking at the assumed mechanisms behind various approaches, we defined his own ideas about the way one breaks an 'overthinking loop'. We also defined, based on his own beliefs, to what extent decisions can be made by analysis and what is the domain of intuition. It turned out that some of the thinking was for the purpose of avoiding unpleasant scenarios, but seemed to create more unpleasantness than it prevented – an insight that resolved much of the drive to analyze and 'magically' provided relaxation and clarity.

Belief Map Consults

In a consult, I help to uncover and structure your relevant beliefs to find the personally logical answers or solutions to your real-life problem.

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A "Belief Map Consult" consist of three elements:

1. an interview

2. structuring of your beliefs, and

3. formulation of the logical solution to the issue you like to resolve

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The process of a "Belief Map Consult" takes about 3 hours, possibly divided over two sessions, and you receive a schematic summary afterward. The total cost is €240.

A belief map consult can be followed up by 1-hr consults to either evaluate the real-life outcome of your next steps, work on your ability to face all aspects of reality or apply the framework to other problems or dilemmas. The rate for follow-up consults is €120. Time limits for sessions are not strict; we finish the problem we started working on.

"One can only find a solution with a realistic perception of the problem"

My book about the most likely solution for many unsolvable problems

Where should we draw a line between what is the domain of feeling and what should be based on knowledge or data?

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When you know your ideas about the nature of consciousness – what constitutes a you and a me – then you can logically derive your answer to this question too, as well as many others.

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What I found in consults, is that most people – both with an analytical and a more spiritual inclination – have a mental model that is partially based on one idea about consciousness and partially based on the opposing idea.

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As a result, they try and combine methods and books with conflicting premises and, as such, make self-contradicting efforts and life choices that will be less and less satisfying until you make up your mind and align your mental model.

The two main ideas about the nature of consciousness

You can either treat the voice in your head as you (which is the premise of about 2/3 of all self-development books) or you can  see it as a habitual illusion of the mind – an ego – which you rather wake up from (the premise of the other 1/3 of the books).

Blending the two, which happens a lot, is the least logical approach. It creates all sorts of unsolvable problems, until you make up your mind.

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Furthermore, there is no conclusive evidence for either of the two essential ideas about consciousness and it's even logically impossible to prove that it's an illusion, which in itself is already worth looking into.

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I came across dozens of books with interesting arguments for both ideas about the nature of consciousness, but these arguments are scattered and often presented in a dogmatic context. I felt that made them unfit for making up your own mind and I made an attempt to write a better one.

A book designed for making up your mind about the nature of consciousness

Since so many real-life problems of clients hinged on the same problem of not having made up one's mind about the nature of consciousness, I took some time off to collect the arguments and turn them into a book for the sole purpose of decision-making.

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The arguments are stripped from any dogmatic claims. It's up to you to decide what's true. They have been divided into ten topics, ranging from hard facts to experiments and surprising interpretations of renowned thinkers and scientists.

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Regardless of your interpretation and conclusion, the book might resolve many problems and dilemmas as well as make clear what to do next.

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The book is available as a paperback for €19,95 and as an e-book for €11,95.

Articles

In these short articles and longer essays, are logical inferences from the point of view that the mind indeed creates a false sense of self. It's up to you to decide if these explanations seem more convincing than those from a normal model of the world or less.

"Any conclusion consistently followed up on is more rewarding then to continue self-contradicting behavior"

About me

My consults and book are intended to help others find out their beliefs, not mine. Yet, like any person, I do hold some beliefs.

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My own interpretation of the arguments I present in my book was that it would make sense to invest time and effort in waking up from this apparent ego-illusion.

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When I looked into the possibilities for support with this, none of the methods or teachers really appealed to me, so I took a Do-It-Yourself ("DIY") approach. After a few intense months, my experiences confirmed my ideas.

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I gradually learned how to perceive life through this new lens and as a result, many little false beliefs and acts of self-hypnotic alterations to reality came to my attention. When they were resolved, which is often challenging, it was very liberating.

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One relevant implication of my core beliefs is the idea that the best path for any person is the one that is true to their own beliefs, even if these will turn out to be logically incorrect.

My expertise

Since 2017, I worked with dozens of people to experience the same shift by thinking more instead of trying to subdue the mind. Sometimes intensely, other times to support clients who prefer a DIY approach, like myself: a Study Retreat.

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I learned that each person can have an initial awakening within a few days, but that it only pays-off if you follow your natural pace, which is personal and sometimes means one has to take more time for the process.

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Some people do well with frequent assistance, while others are better off alone until they get really stuck. I also found that certain environments and circumstances generally seem to agree with anyone making the deep dive to wake up from the illusion of self.

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I offer my expertise in three formats to readers of my book who commit to the analytical path for mental awakening: consults, support for a Study Retreat and a Tailored Program.

Analytical consult

Single sessions for assistance with either the initial experience of mental awakening, to regain the perspective or to look at aspects of real-life that are difficult to understand from this point of view due to conditioning.

Study Retreat Weeks

Advice for planning a Study Retreat anywhere in the world and a per week support commitment, either in-person or online, to enhance your process and get you going again when you get stuck in the process.

Tailored program

A tailored 8-12 week immersion program with a scope of achieving an initial awakening as well as integration – the learning of how to apply the new frame of mind to real-life problems, triggers and dilemmas.

"Life is essentially a game, but will only be experienced as such on moments when both the pleasant and the painful implications of that worldview are accepted."